Did they hand out straightjackets in this drill?


At first I had no idea what this drill was about. Fake doctors? Fake blood? Sound effects? People running aimlessly? Why, there was even a kid dressed up as Simón Bolívar, with sword and everything. Did he dress like that specially for the fake bombing raid, or is that his usual attire?

What is this lunacy?

It’s…no, you mean it’s…a drill on how to react to an imminent US bombing?!?? Sure looks like it.

All along, I kept wondering “how do they get this many people to turn up to an exercise this batty?!”

Then it all made sense. At 4:15, just before the video ends, the propaganda hacks pull back the curtain just for a second, revealing what it takes to get hundreds of Venezuelans to show up to a US bombing “drill”.

I’m not going to spoil it. Just make sure to watch to the very end.

Oh chavistas, never change.

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    • Oh, come on, dude, you made us swallow the whole hour of smartmatic praise video, the least you could do is to bite this bullet, hehehehehe.

    • What I can’t get over is the fact that the international press can’t seem to articulate the simple FACT that the sanctions are not against Venezuela. They are against seven individuals that the US has determined will be refused entry to the US and any assets these bad actors have in the US will be seized. That’s it. There is nothing more to it than that, at least for now, the ball is as they say in Venezuela’s court. You notice that for these father serious allegations no one in Venezuela is even suggesting an investigation. (Why investigate when you know it is true) Yet the international press, the rest of the Latin American “leadership?) are all parroting the myth that this is sanction against Venezuela because they have no balls to admit the failure and corruption and narco-loving criminals that have become Venezuela. It has never been even been good theatre when wags like the current thugs in charge of Venezuela put on an act like this so called drill. It is beyond pathetic and yet they will all slap themselves on the back and pound their macho chests and think they have done a masterful job in propaganda worthy of Joseph Goebbels . When Goebbels himself would look at that video and probably put to death the morons that came up with that. He would go, what’s with the knife?? This is a bombing morons. and promptly have the director of that drill blown to bits and pieces of the body spread around the street for realism. Now that’s how you wag the dog!! It is hard to laugh at such a pathetic thing as this when you know that these morons seriously think they have done a great job. They cannot see themselves, so they simply cannot see. So sad for real Venezuela as their beautiful country is simply destroyed.

      • Eh, it is likely a combination of a) the international press never overlooks the option of portraying the US as a global bully. b) a sensationalist story of the David vs. Goliath which sells copy. and c) poor journalistic fact-checking and regurgitating content from other sources. Plus the internal and external PR value for ideologically aligned folks is absolutely fab.

        If you’ve watched government TV, when have production values ever, EVER mattered? Ideology trumps all.

      • “..the international press can’t seem to articulate the simple FACT that the sanctions are not against Venezuela..”

        Let’s be specific, which elements of “the international press” are you referring to? I’ve seen that fact referred to repeatedly, so maybe you’re getting your information from the wrong place.

    • Ditto on this comment. There just are no words. Especially for the knife wound which presents at the Medical Triage Centro amid the hail of bullets and bombs.

  1. LOL!

    I think the child-bolivar is a surrealistic tour-de-force. Pure genius.

    And what about the ending? HAHAHAHAHAHA.

  2. Chavismo has made us discover that there are limits to how much gross corniness , epica buffa spectacles .we can bear , that there is a basic sense of aesthetics that can be insulted through exposure to this sort of cheap farcical play acting . In the end the remmuneration for people participating in the spectacle is the access to scarce goods !! Any way the whole show Is like a bad telenovela from the early times of Venezuelan TV.

  3. To be brutally honest, after sort of watching the video out of the corner of my eye with the sound off, I expected an overturned truck of frozen chicken, even with the quasi-military commentator. Then I noticed how half-assed they were running and realized that there must be government sponsorship of some sort; everything the government does, aside from corruption, is half-assed.

    As a veteran of many mass-casualty drills, it just isn’t sufficiently authentic without the rows of little tiny chairs in the triage area.

  4. WTF! What’s with the guy with the butcher knife in his chest.
    This is a bombing isn’t it?

    And having people run under heavy elevated concrete roads during a bombing doesn’t sound like a great idea.

    Just another hysterical circus from the idiots for the idiots.

  5. Important fact about Imperialism: Imperial powers, when carrying out aerial bombing campaigns, assiduously avoid major points of infrastructure such as overpasses and tunnels.

    • I inmediatly thought about this. I’m no military expert but if you want to disrupt the enemy’s movement ability, wouldn’t bridges and tunnels be among the first targets?

      • verdad que sí. pero lo entiendo. porque la repetición “Es contra tí” de parte de Bernal, es un mantra transcendental. (poesía inesperada)

      • Hola Quico, longtime fan here.

        I may be in the minority, but I think Bernal is absolutely right. The sanctions WILL significantly affect thousands of normal Venezuelans.

        Given that those 7 guys have lost access to the millions of USD they had parked in El Imperio, no doubt they will have to pilfer state coffers even more, re-double their dirty dealing efforts, etc, to replace their losses. Apart from being an outrage (they stole that money fair & square!), this will mean even fewer USD available for importers, which will in turn worsen shortages, lengthen lines, and shorten tempers even further. Also, how many more Venezuelans might die in violent crimes as The 7 ratchet up their money-making efforts? “¡ES CONTRA TI, CAMPESINO!”, indeed.

        Of course it seems like it couldn’t get much worse, but you never know. Many times it has seemed like this gobierno de rateros has finally hit rock bottom, yet somehow they always manage to find a way to keep digging.

  6. Words fail me–but, running to be fed,or, perhaps, from motorcycle-riding/robbing Colectivistas sinking knives in chests and shooting people in the head, and Bernal saying that having his visa taken away was a threat to “you, hombre de Carapita..campesino…etc.” is priceless.

  7. Maybe this is a dry run for a “Wag the Dog” war. You know, so they don’t have people dressed as Bolivar during the attack on Maracaibo.

  8. As a Yanqui Imperialista, I want to know how our military’s plan to stab random people that run from our bombers was leaked to the Bolivarian government.
    I demand an inquiry and to find the traitors in the US that keep sharing our military secrets, from bombing attacks by unarmed Super Tuconas to cancer death ray guns and knife wounds to random pedestrians get leaked before they can be enacted.
    How are we supposed to conquer and colonize Latin America if our brilliant tactics keep getting exposed right before we strike?
    I recommend the US Marines consider potato guns for the coming inevitable invasion. They just need to plan with more secrecy.

    • Laugh if you will…but you just can’t over-prepare for the dreaded BKB (Butcher Knife Bomb)…

      That’s right, the USAF is apparently now raining BUTCHER KNIVES OF DEATH FROM THE SKY!!

      Let all Evil know…and fear

      • I thought the same thing. SmartKnives™. Everyone knows the CIA is secretly behind the rise in crime; it coincides with chavismo after all! They’ve been deploying drones with SmartKnives everywhere in Venezuela. Why, this explains the whole Serra thing! A clusterbomb of SmartKnives!

        Well, except for the places with guns.

        • I’m sure that would be our fault too.


          Haven’t worked that part out yet, but just give me a little more time. As one of my old public speaking profs once told us back in the day, “You can get an elephant into a violin case, you just have to work at it…”

  9. A better drill would be to teach the barrio people to run like hell from the criminal trying to kill them for their cell phone.

  10. This is a massive overreaction to the U.S. stopping the vacation plans of seven drug-dealing, corrupt human rights violators in the Chavismo Government. I doubt that any of the seven would ever dare enter the U.S. even without the ban. It seems that Chavismo has had these plans for quite a long time and this is a lame reason to activate them.

    I saw several items-
    -First Maduro wants to make the U.S. a scapegoat for all of Venezuela’s problems. This exercise was just to scare people but it looked more like a party. Venezuelans know the U.S. will not bomb Caracas.
    -Second, the Venezuela military is incompetent, corrupt. and cannot protect the country; Maduro is trying to provoke a war for propaganda only. A real war with the U.S. would last only minutes and would destroy virtually all military infrastructure. I bet the red berets are kept in an underground safe.
    -Third, what was a collectivo motorcycle gang doing running for protection? They kill civilians but refuse to help their country in war?

    • “Third, what was a collectivo motorcycle gang doing running for protection? They kill civilians but refuse to help their country in war?”

      One of them would probably reply to you: “Do you want us fighting the Marines? Do you want to see us dead? We are only brave against unarmed civilians.”

      • Told to me by a gentlemen at one of the colas, a neighbor of his , a very chavista old lady , volunteered for a day of target practice with the militia to prepare for the invasion , next day she avoided talking about it , but later relented , she was very dissapointed, the instructors were supposed to be army marksmen , instead they turned out to be runny nosed drug addled young colectivos , who when shooting at the supposed target shot all the surrounding walls and windows instead !! Hail the valiant patriots who will defend the sacred soil of the fatherland from the Marines.!!.

    • Gullible chavistas who pray at the altar of Chávez are perfect receptacles for what the government tells them. Therefore, they had better believe the US will bomb Caracas. The agnostics figure a free meal is as good a reason as any to join the civic-military circus exercise, Bolívar costumes optional.

      Meanwhile, elsewhere on the planet, gullible foreign plants are doing their job, in this case, trying to shame the Canadian parliament for speaking against Venezuela, before demanding that they ask for the extradition of Luis Posada Carriles. The well produced spot, subtitles to boot, counts on the group’s interpreter: a woman with a Nordic or German accent who evidently chose to immigrate to Canada, instead of Venezuela. I wonder why: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vTiDAxgmHMo .

      • The spokesperson on the video is Sabrina Johnson, who is affiliated with CPC-ML, ie aMaoist splinter group from the Canadian Communist Party. They are pretty much certified lunatics. Most people think that half of them are undercover police officers. (They have 100 members nationwide.)

  11. Jaja, el plan de contingencia es correr a un tunel a comer arepas. La unica forma de ver este video sin que mi cabeza explote es con humor….

  12. I noticed the bolivar costume kid as well. It was planned, no one dresses like that and gets a camera shot by chance….

    Now, the real sad part is not that this was produced, nor that they manage to coerce/ motivate extras for the show, or that they did it so mamarracho! , IMO the sad part is that they know this serves their communication strategy for the captive audience they aim to continue to manipulate.

    Venezuela is FUBAR big time!

  13. I agree that nothing arouses the passions of Bolivarian socialist militants like the prospect of a free calorie-packed snack, but I was really struck, in all seriousness, by Laura Weffer’s observation on Quico’s interview yesterday that people are really distressed about the prospect of a US invasion. If you control the message, it does not take very long to get regular people to start thinking and behaving like crazy people, and that in my view is something to really get stressed about.

  14. Did they change the name of the tunnel recently? As far as I know is La Planicie not La Planicia, but as my training in civico-military special operations front line reporting is not up to date I’m not sure.

  15. Boy, this video is so bad that is actually good, it just ripped the badness continuum landing in something that we will watch 20, 30 and 50 years from now and it will put a smile in our face.

    What that smile is, I do not know, mine was the smile of incredulity combined with “lord have mercy” of these poor devils. It is the smile of thanks god I am not living in Venezuela. Or the smile of look at these poor bastards running after a sanguche con cafe made in the solicialismo. It also a smile or more like a laugh mocking a pure undistilled Chavista ridiculez.

    But down the road, I have smile in my face with crushed heart and a retched stomach. Not for the people that just do what they are told to do, but with the Generals and Fredy, and the whole propaganda. I am assuming the mass running were checked by Bernal to ensure they are gay-free. And for the generals, I am also assuming that the traded toilet paper and harina pan for duck and cover…duck and cover at 70% inflation, unchecked corruption and 16 years of unimaginable waste.

  16. And now we see why chavistas are such crackpots.

    Globovisión and Dolar Today together couldn’t muster such an alarmist propaganda.

    And those folks have to digest that bullshit 24/7…

  17. I am glad the foreign media doesn’t cover Venezuela properly, this is just so embarassing….WTF. For me the high point of madness at the root of it all is why are they so upset about *el imperio* banning 7 people from going to……errrr…..*el imperio* wtf, and since when (I was middle class in Venezuela 30 years ago, couldn’t afford to fly to bloody Aruba!), since when does the man from Carapita have anything to fear from not being able to have a visa to go to ……*el imperio*, WTF. I am jus ton WTF overdrive. It’s neck and neck North Korea vs Venezuela. I don’t see any other close contender for the prize of Loonie-Tin-Pot-Country of the year.

    • Indeed WTF. It’s so embarrassing, it makes you wanna find the line where you turn in your fucking passport. It’s so bad it makes you wonder if Venezuela and Zimbabwe are not competing to see who can f*** up their country the most. It’s sooo bad it makes you wonder how the f***ing regime has not yet imploded. It’s soooooo f***’ing bad, it makes you wonder if the Bermuda triangle doesn’t really lie somewhere further south and Venezuela is caught in it violating all laws of f***ing reason. It makes you wonder if f***ing Hollywood did not write a contract with the government of Venezuela to turn the entire f***ing country into the set for a f***ing twilight zone movie.

      But keep in mind the real point of this incredibly low budget production: it’s to suggest that Venezuela is the victim of foreign aggression, it’s to show that if there were any attack against Venezuela it would most harm ordinary civilians, not the military. The post by Super further down hit it on the nose. I would call them a bunch of cowards, but I think perspective is a central issue. Apparently chavistas really do (still!!) see themselves as downtrodden victims, looking up at the sole of the yankee boot, rather than as a bunch of mediocre mamarrachos keeping the country sunk in misery. How they must miss Chavez right now. At least he had the courage to look at the yankees at eye level, he pulled it off. That was one thing that was admirable about Chavez, why so many in LatAm praised him, like Castro before him, his ability to present himself as a worthy foe. There is no pride to be had in these ridiculous fools, not one of them, they can’t even act the part.

  18. So the US has developed a drone that -not content with bombing your city- will straight up shank you with a knife! How does anyone stand a chance against the Gangster Drone??

  19. To me it seems they are running towards the buffet before the food runs out. The idiot with the knife? There’s an idiot in every crowd.


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