The Fake Banesco Bank Branch in Tocuyito Prison Allegedly Really a Pizzeria

It's come to this: the big controversy racking the Venezuelan public sphere is whether the fake Banesco branch inside Tocuyito really was or wasn't a fast food joint.

I’m not sure there’s a lot more I can say about this story. Just, y’know, we’re now being told the fake Banesco bank branch that was reportedly operating in Tocuyito Prison was really a pizzeria.

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It’s fun to try to pinpoint which part of this story makes the least sense.

Perhaps it’s this: Pizzesco reportedly had to close some time ago because even the Pran can’t source enough flour.

UPDATE (4:15 p.m.):
If this pizzeria story strikes you as totally ludicrous, you’re not alone.

Eight days ago, the reporter who originally ran with this story showed photos of a real Fake Bank agency operating in this same place.


There are videos, too:

It sure looks like it was hastily repurposed into an incoherent prison fake-bank-real-pizza-joint-with-no-flour, for the purpose of…hell, I give up.

Oh, Venezuela…never change!