SUPCACVEN Can’t Scam a Scammer

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Photo: Runrunes

Ah, the beauty of sunsets on the Seychelles. The tranquility of minimalist living, of sailboats, girlfriends and cocktails… I wouldn’t give up any of these. I’ve achieved the optimal lifestyle, and all I need to keep making tons of money is my computer and good internet access every now and then. No, I don’t trade Venezuela bonds, and I am no regime-connected bolichico. I simply take advantage of gross inefficiencies in the crypto market – “shitcoins” like TRX and stupid ICOs. I have a real knack for timing the market, making money from idiots. And boy did my mouth water when I first heard about the petro.

I knew some would be excited about the first “cryptocurrency issued by a sovereign state.” This is a narrative for fools; the petro is being issued by a failed state with a hyperinflationary currency – but not everyone knows that. That’s why the government sent a delegation to Asia: crypto traders there will buy just about anything if you tell a good story (I should know!). I thought of the petro as an opportunity to buy low and sell high to irrational Japanese teenagers… Until I read the contract the Venezuelan government asked me to sign.

My first moment of hesitation came from the hassle I had to go through to get the contract. Waiting 13 hours for an email, activating my access, waiting seven more hours for another email with a broken link… If this government is so bad with something as simple as maintaining servers, I really can’t trust them to transfer PTR (a token that isn’t even developed yet). No way I’m gambling my money like that.

But it gets worse. The contract is between a buyer and SUPCACVEN, the Cryptoasset Superintendency of Venezuela. Shouldn’t I be signing contracts with Venezuela’s Central Bank, which, according to the Constitution, “necessarily and exclusively exercises the national monetary competence” (Art. 318)?

Fishy.

Section 4 it requires the buyer to commit, irrevocably, to acquire petros without any information on the mechanism by which the price will be determined.

The fine print also requires the buyer to assume all obligations, while SUPCACVEN assumes none – signing is no PTR guarantee.

There’s no way in hell I’d buy this, but I kept reading the contract just for fun. Sections 1-3 state the government’s intention to personally identify you. Uh, how about no? I’ve made my money staying anonymous, and I intend to keep it that way. I know what happens when you expose your identity to governments like this one – you open yourself to extortion.

Section 4 is particularly ill-intentioned: it requires the buyer to commit, irrevocably, to acquire petros without any information on the mechanism by which the price will be determined. It’s a formal and binding offer to buy petros using dollars or euros, and SUPCACVEN reserves the right to change the unit price of PTR. No clause in the contract mentions the heavily-advertised claim that each petro will be worth “the international price of an oil barrel with discount.”

Hah, okay! So if I drunkenly sign an offer to spend $100,000 on petros, SUPCACVEN can decide not to send me any, since they could always claim I didn’t fulfill some criteria. Worse, if they set the price at $100 per unit (which the contract allows), I’ll end up getting 1,000 PTR at a hugely inflated price, blowing my chance to speculatively prey on the weak. Worst of all, I wouldn’t be able to refuse, since the next section demands the buyer’s consent to automatically debit the amount he specified from his overseas bank account. That’s not all! If I disagree with the way they’ve handled things in any way, guess which courts will exclusively decide my case? Venezuelan courts!

To top it off, SUPCACVEN requires you to read all of their publications (does this include their tweets? Their retweets of President Maduro?) and “the most recent risk disclosure document”, a document that doesn’t publicly exist yet, and therefore no potential buyer could have read. So much for transparency!

I’ll stop there. My time is precious and there’s more “shitcoins” to be traded – one man’s trash is another’s treasure. I have what it takes to milk this crypto market, but the petro is so bad not even a professional scammer would buy into it. Someone this desperate for hard currency, especially a government, must be a failure.

Now, back to those cocktails…

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18 COMMENTS

  1. Is your mind OK after reading the offer document? I’ve gone rock climbing in hazardous situations, I’ve snorkeled in waters with sharks assembling for feeding time (late afternoon), I’ve survived fraternity hazing … I’ve done a lot of things. But I would never, ever, risk my sanity reading that offering thing. Heck, just reading what you said is bad enough!

  2. One authorizes the Maduro regime to take your money, and later decide how many petros you get and at what price and how much of the authorized money they will take (all of it).

    They will decide price and quantity either on the basis of an “auction” and the “final closing price.” Or petros “will be assigned and directed by the subsequent analysis of the Client by objective criteria of national discretionary reserve.”

    The regime’s choice.

    Note that by the regime’s valuation formula, which can be reduced to Acceptance Price of the Petro=$(1-last discount), if you receive the “final closing price” of an “auction” it represents no discount from the value the government assigns to the petro no matter how far below the price of oil the final closing price may be.

    The second alternative reserved by the regime (“subsequent analysis … by objective criteria”) appears to reference its still undisclosed, or to-be-determined, schedule of discounts across tranches.

    Clients acknowledge reading the authorizing decree and the “technical papers,” but the government does commit to be bound by them. (The White Paper was updated on Friday, without any notation of a change of version. Even still, the “documentation” available remains an internally inconsistent mess on material points)

    Also, there has still been no disclosure of any “purchase-sale contract” for oil. If there is one (the authorizing “decree” one must “acknowledge reading” says there will be), you don’t get to see it before you buy, if it exists.

    Give your money to Maduro or flush it down the toilet is the moral choice presented.

    • Agreed. Even without an unconstitutional “purchase-sale contract” for subsoil oil, Decree 3,196 is based upon the unconstitutional State of Exception (and its 13 or so extensions) and the petro is a debt needed to be authorized by the National Assembly.

    • MRubio
      Nice to have you back!
      How is your granddaughter? If there is anything she needs, let me know and I will give my best effort to finding it for her and sending it to you.
      Our friend in Caracas has been mugged (again) and had her cell phone stolen (again). I’m not sure about sending one from the States that will work on whatever network she uses. If you can help get a phone to her I would be grateful. I will reimburse you for the cost. It doesn’t need to be anything fancy. Her phone is her only access to the internet outside of when she is in the office at her work. When I find out what does work, I will get an unlocked one from Amazon and send it on to her. In the meantime, any help will be appreciated. A woman not having a phone is unnatural. She doesn’t know what to do with the extra hand. 🙂
      I just tried calling you.
      Sometimes a recording comes on in Spanish and then English saying that the call can not be completed. There also has been a recording saying that calls going into this country can not be completed. Other times, it rings a few times and then switches to a busy signal. Frustrating.

  3. The moronic idea that Maduro and his Cubano chamos can play the international monetary market by their own rules, is itself a howler.

  4. This sounds really sarcastic.

    But chavismo being chavismo, one can believe they are desperate to hoard dollars however they can.

  5. Here is a perfect opportunity for our friend Judi Lynn to express her support for Chavismo- by purchasing as much SUPCACVEN cryptocurrency as possible. Put some SUPCACVEN cryptocurrency in your IRA, Judi Lynn!

  6. Seriously, who are these fools that are going to get scammed by Maduro?

    Are they all well known faces that adorn the back of a milk carton already?

  7. At first moment I thought that petro would be a chameleonic shape of dolarization, but it is s fraud, a scam in the whole rule. Basically the venezuelan regime wants to cheat you with a smile. Shameful.

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