The petro is here (it isn’t). Last Monday, Maduro went on another of his mandatory broadcasts, a cadena, for the launch of the petro, their not-so-new State backed cryptocurrency.

If you are having a déjà vu, it’s probably because you remember the other launch back in February. But that was just the presale where they presented a project, the whitepaper (or the seven versions of it), and started selling tokens. These tokens would be exchanged in the future for real petros once the platform was up and running.

We are in that future now. So… where are them Petros? Where’s the operational platform that was promised?

First, let’s look at the webpage:

Nice English!

Before we use the petro, we need to install a wallet. Simple enough, so let’s try that!

But, against all odds: the Wallet is literally an empty folder with the word “wallet” on it.

Maybe the manual can help us?

        A single page with the word manual on it.

Let’s do something else then, let’s check the blockchain explorer, the place where we can see all of the transactions in petro happening right now in an open and transparent way.

Alright, so: the pages, specially the English version, are a scorching hot mess. But the failure of the launch goes beyond a hastily put together webpage.

First of all, the Whitepaper (the document that contains the whole concept and goal of the project)  is not supposed to change, because it shows unclarity and development chaos. But, guess what? They have changed the Whitepaper, A LOT.

They changed the formula to calculate the price of the petro and they changed the (absurd) concept that backs it. We all thought that the petro would be backed only by oil, I mean, that’s what they’ve been saying it for months, right?

But not anymore. According to the Whitepaper: “Any economy would greatly suffer if its currency experimented oscillations as great as the ones experienced by the price of oil today.” In short: they found out that their stupid idea was moronic indeed, so they added more commodities to the mix, specifically gold, iron and diamonds, to make the currency more stable. It will still be sold at $60, but oil prices will affect only 50% of that value. And the other 50% will be affected by the prices of the other three commodities. But don’t be fooled, this doesn’t mean that you will be able to trade petro by diamonds now. The commodities that back the petro are only used to magically transfer their values to it, but that’s it.

Now remember, this is the price they will try to sell the petro for, not the price of the real market because, spoiler alert, the petro is unbuyable and undetectable within any blockchain, not trusted and not decentralized. There’s no real market for it.

The other radical change in the Whitepaper is the technology. Before, they said that the petro would run on the Ethereum platform, then they changed it to NEM. Then, literally on the launch date, they said that they had created their own blockchain, and that they are running it off of it (which thanks to open software is easier to deploy than it sounds, by the way).

They have changed strategy three times in less than a year. They clearly know what they are doing, we can trust them, guys, fear not.

In the last page of their hastily put together Whitepaper, they have this diagram of how the blockchain works, and as reddit users have pointed out, it’s taken directly from the development documentation of the cryptocurrency Dash.

Just copy and paste. The boss won’t notice.

Now, the important part: when will I get my sweet, sweet petros?

Short answer, never. Long answer: ven para darte una cachetada.

Maduro said that the petro would now be traded on the six most important exchange platforms in the world. He didn’t say which ones, but according to this list those would be Binance, ZB.com, OKEx, Huobi and Bithumb.

I checked all six, the petro is not there.

He even showed a laptop where he symbolically turned on the petro blockchain by pressing enter. It’s been a week since that countdown has reached 0, and we’re still waiting for anything to happen. Also, the official webpage has been down ever since.

Maduro assured that Venezuelans will be able to exchange petros for bolivars in September.

Let’s wait for another cadena, another launch, another Whitepaper, another team of developers.

Let’s wait and see, I’ll start looking for popcorn.

This piece is part of our #omichronicles series, click here to join the rebellion.

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25 COMMENTS

  1. Known liars and thieves are asking for their own True Believers (who have zero wealth, due to said liars and thieves) to invest money in a product that can’t be purchased, with currency that has no value.

    What could go wrong?

  2. Thats why I’m still very confused, and still not reporting to people I talk to, when they say “X has to be paid with petros”

    All you can say is that Maduro or some other idiot said that. But actually forcing anybody to pay with petros? How? You may as well say you are forcing people to pay with photos of Elvis alive in 2018, and they know it.

    • Are you saying Elvis is NOT ALIVE!! I saw him a the Chinese Grauman Theather last week !

      and my photos???? Worthless.. damn

  3. Christian, excellent report, and thank you for the diagram “Concepto Basico De Una Cadena De Bloques”–I can now more easily understand why the crypto-currencies are going to become universally used by the world’s 8 billion population….

  4. So. Tx3 goes into Hash3 which joins Hash2 to make Hash23 which joins Hash01 to make a Merkle Root. The Merkle Root teams up with a Prev Hash and a Nonce to make a Block Header. I assume this Block Header is a link in the chain of Blocks?

    This is so eloquently simple it can’t possibly go wrong. I’m in for twenty grand.

  5. Interesting read. Call me old fashioned but I still think a crypto government and a crypto currency are the perfect match.

  6. I think I read recently that the regime is requiring that passports be paid for with petros? If the operating platform is not even in place yet then how are people obtaining passports?

    • “A partir de mañana en el plan revitalizado de servicios de prestación de gasolina para combatir el contrabando de gasolina en la frontera, vamos a proceder a cobrar en todas las criptomonedas, especialmente el Petro”

      http://www.correodelorinoco.gob.ve/cobro-de-combustible-venezolano-en-la-frontera-con-colombia-sera-en-petro/

      During the first Petro launch event 8 months ago, Maduro said that they would start selling fuel for cryptocurrencies, including the Petro, at the gas stations near the border, starting the next day. We are still waiting

    • Simple answer–they aren’t–“no physical materials to make them”, UNLESS– (you bajar de la mula–con verdes).

    • Oh Tom, you big goof! Getting an impossible to obtain document with a non-existent form of currency is the least of ChavismoLands problems. Because there is no intention of selling passports… if there were, then people could buy passports with Sovereigns. (Of course, we all know that… but not your typical Maduro voter!) The biggest problem is that the Sovereign has little/no value to anyone outside of Venezuela. And Maduro doesn’t need Venezuelan money. Of course, if you have real currency, then someone (low level bureaucrat) can find a way to get you your shiny new document. The downside is that a person with hard currency wants to leave Maduro’s Utopian paradise… can’t let that happen! Best bet is to keep that gravy train inside the borders.

      This is the last gasp money grab for Chavismo. Their attempt at getting fiscal legitimacy and they can’t pull it off despite their Russian helpers.

      • I guess I will always prefer folding money with pictures of famous Americans on the front and that creepy All Seeing Eye on the back.

        Bob Seger summed it up nicely:

        Call me a relic, call me what you will
        Say I’m old-fashioned, say I’m over the hill
        Today’s music ain’t got the same soul
        I like that old time rock ‘n’ roll

        • Oh, they keep coming up with new ways to steal:

          In addition to taking a cut of all remittances from ex-pats to their family in the country, if you leave the country and didn’t TELL them…and you still have funds in a VZ institution…bye bye money.

      • “This is the last gasp money grab for Chavismo”

        I hope you mean latest instead of last! There are way to many ways for Chavismo to make serious money on a daily bases. Tens of millions of dollars every single day, I’m sure I don’t have to list the commodities here. Venezuela’s bad luck is that it is a shit hole with enormous riches and wealth …… and the Cubans ain’t letting that go EVER!!!!

  7. The “concept” here, of course, as everything in KLEPTOhaitizuela, is to STEAL.

    The deceive, to confuse, to mislead, and then STEAL some more. In whatever way they can. Food Clapcrap, bogus construction contracts, gold embezzlement, minerals debacle, oil monies on triple-kick-backs from the Chinese, you name it.

    The Klepto-Petro is just another clumsy tool for massive theft. Simple as that. As everything in shitholes like Kleptozuela, that’s what the Criminals in charge do. And the Millions clueless pueblo-supporters are tempted to do the same. They make it inscrutable, complicated and confusing on purpose, like every other ‘economic’ or “finance” measures : to trick the uneducated, highly corruptible populace.

    Beyond the clumsy scam attempt which will obviously fail, it’s just another Castro/Chinese smoke screen. Remember the Romans? The understood long ago what it takes to subdue a clueless populace: Pan y Circo. Bread and Circus. Some Clapcrap bags and cheap yuca, plus Chavistoide entertainment. Bulsshit cadenas about Gold deals, Klepto-Petro deals, the War against the evil Empire, Magnicidio attempts, trips to Instabul butcher shops, TV signals easy to steal to watch putrid soap operas, anything.

    Anything to keep the clueless, uneducated public distracted and dependent on food.

    Next think you know, Tarek is gonna announce public investments for a Kleptozuelan Rocket to conquer planet Mars. DelcyWhore and TibiBitch will be the personal flight attendants for the lobotomized pueblo-people wishing to visit the red planet. The Bolivarian Space Rocket will dwarf Nasa’s latest inter-planetary technology, fueled by the finest “Gasolina Soberana Petro-Espacial”, which will propel each mission way faster than the speed of light. The conquest of Mars will commence in just a few years, 2025, when lots of pueblo-people will get brand-new “Viviendas de la rebolusion Marsiana” with an ocean view to planet Venus.

  8. The “concept” here, of course, as everything in KLEPTOhaitizuela, is to STEAL.

    The deceive, to confuse, to mislead, and then STEAL some more. In whatever way they can. Food Clapcrap, bogus construction contracts, gold embezzlement, minerals debacle, oil monies on triple-kick-backs from the Chinese, you name it.

    The Klepto-Petro is just another clumsy tool for massive theft. Simple as that. As everything in shitholes like Kleptozuela, that’s what the Criminals in charge do. And the Millions clueless pueblo-supporters are tempted to do the same. They make it inscrutable, complicated and confusing on purpose, like every other ‘economic’ or “finance” measures : to trick the uneducated, highly corruptible populace.

    Beyond the clumsy scam attempt which will obviously fail, it’s just another Castro/Chinese smoke screen. Remember the Romans? The understood long ago what it takes to subdue a clueless populace: Pan y Circo. Bread and Circus. Some Clapcrap bags and cheap yuca, plus Chavistoide entertainment. Bulsshit cadenas about Gold deals, Klepto-Petro deals, the War against the evil Empire, Magnicidio attempts, trips to Instabul butcher shops, TV signals easy to steal to watch putrid soap operas, anything.

    Anything to keep the clueless, uneducated public distracted and dependent on food.

    Next thing you know, Tarek is gonna announce public investments for a Kleptozuelan Rocket to conquer planet Mars. DelcyWhore and TibiBitch will be the personal flight attendants for the lobotomized pueblo-people wishing to visit the red planet. The Bolivarian Space Petro-Rocket will dwarf Nasa’s latest inter-planetary technology, fueled by the finest “Gasolina Soberana Petro-Espacial”, which will propel each mission way faster than the speed of light. The conquest of Mars will culminate in just a few years, 2025, when lots of pueblo-people will get brand-new “Petro-Viviendas de la Rebolusion Marsiana” with an ocean view to planet Venus.

  9. Seriously now and I’m very sad about all this how long can they drag this out and after that what?

    From what I understand there’s hardly any seeds for are the new planting which was going to be an adequate to begin with. Big payments coming up to Conoco bonds due… how will they even be importing food?

    • That is what Chavismo is counting on. Dragging it out, and pointing out there is no viable alternative.

      1. There is no actual opposition. MUD is essentially dead… not that they had any ideas anyway. Their mantra was always, “We can do Chavismo better than Chavismo!”

      2. El Pueblo doesn’t want an actual end to Chavismo. They, like the opposition, want a new and improved (translation: Good Old Days) Chavismo.

      I don’t see a way forward.

  10. CC digital media gurus here keep going from irrelevant little topics to somewhat-relevant ones, covered the wrong way. (Case in point: How, exactly, do the kleptozuelan thugs hope to steal with the Klepto-Petro scam).

    The Petro Scam is a joke compared to the Mega-Billions stolen on the DRUG TRADE.

    Kleptozuela has probably become the biggest platform for international DRUG TRADE in the freaking planet.
    From Mexico, Colombia, Brasil, Bolivia through KLEPTO-zuela, to the Caribbean islands, to Europe and the USA, even to Asia and Africa. All through KLEPTO_NARCO_zuela. Most of it. Gazillions of gazillionsof US$ and Euros no one ever dares to even mention.

    Guess all media and all reporters are scared to death to report on the ELEPHANT in the room no one dares to talk about, huh? Scared? Lazy? Pathetically uninformed?

    Forget about oil income, the Chinese and Russians and Cubans own than, plus a few million from the Gringos and the Indians to pay the corrupt military monthly allocations.

    That’s peanuts compare to the MASSIVE DRUG TRADE.

    THAT is what keeps the Hundreds of Thousands of top Criminals in Cleptozuela well-fed and in power.

    In case you didn’t know.. CC here and other media outlets hardly ever write about BIG things. Wimps.

    • My understanding is that the biggest single destination for drugs shipped from Venezuela is West Africa, although there are also landings in Spain. The Africans are “distributors” and “wholesalers”, mostly to Europe with some also going to the Middle East. The trade has occasionally been featured on the National Geographic channel, but National Geographic has been unable to get government-connected crooks to talk on television, even behind masks. I don’t see how CC can write about this trade if the higher level crooks keep their silence.

  11. They’re trying really hard to both take away the meager savings the people still possess and ban them from ever touching something else than this “peso convertible cubano”, effectively plunging the 98% of the population straight into genocidal famine, while they try to bypass the sanctions that stop the enchufados’ access to millions of dollars via currency monopoly.

  12. “Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain”…or those web pages.

    Really, the enchufados are just trying to inject a little comedy into the tragedy called Venezuela.

  13. Meanwhile we all standby and watch the Chavismos loot the country of virtually all its natural riches. It seems unlikely that this is going on without some interface with European and American banking systems, which cannot be lost on Trump et al. The question is, how to counter all this from without, from outside the country, since change from within looks improbable.

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