The kind of Easter Week chavismo is having

According to the government, this past week has been all about fried fish, pristine beaches, and no dead protesters.

Despite the government’s doomed “Y’all better go to the beach” initiative, Easter Week has been positively brimming with news, with Venezuela making headlines worldwide. First Capriles’ political disqualification caused a bit of an international backlash, then protests and riots started to spread all over the country,  even in the least expected of places. None of us can get over our fat communist dictator getting egged by that San Felix crowd. That moment of mirth doesn’t last, though, when you reflect that five have already been killed in the protesters.

The temptation, when the news gets ‘hot’ like this, is to take up permanent residence in the opposition’s discursive bubble. But how’s Easter looking over on Chavismo mágico wonderland?

https://twitter.com/PsuvParroquia_U/status/852530978107121666

Good, it seems.

While Diosdado’s take on the opposition’s Easter menu is everything but inviting, seems like deep fried  fish is on every chavista table.

 

Zero words on the eggcident and, worse, not a single expression of sorrow about the 5 lives lost so far.

Jorge sure loves a walk down memory lane. And of course, retweeting:

https://twitter.com/ChavistaGanador/status/851963233221136384

Seriously, we all saw the video, Maduro got egged. Move on.

https://twitter.com/VielmaEsTachira/status/852258989538766848

Vielma is all business as usual.

https://twitter.com/VielmaEsTachira/status/851929050910248961

https://twitter.com/VielmaEsTachira/status/851930067265519616

Admitting the taxis that carried armed colectivos to attack protesters in Táchira were actually from Misión Transporte or so it seems.

https://twitter.com/NestorReverol/status/852493744226144256

That’s more on  “Misión Go to the Beach Already.”

There’s also this:

https://twitter.com/NestorReverol/status/852193304771006465

Thank god, otherwise this could have happened

More on the chaveztwittersphere:

But also:

Venezuela on the beach. Basically what he’s saying is “Terrorist attacks” are being held but everything is a-ok… at…the…beach.

On that same note, Aristobulo:

And one of my favorite, the always reliable Misión Verdad, if you are ever low on Chavismo Mágico a read will boost it right up.

“Psycho old ladies.” Nice touch, you guys.

Seems like the best strategy in defeating fascism is going on vacation. Literally:

I do love their hashtags.

Twitter out of eggs? I’m sure thanks to San Félix, our president could spare some.

And buried in dozens of useless twits, this one:

Yes, Venezuela did pay. A hideous smelly deal that should be frontpage news. But, instead #YoSiDisfrutoMiSemanaSanta and related stories is what you’ll find on Hegemon corp.

Today, no metro service in 28 stations and we finally know the reason:

But Aristobulo said they were tokens of appreciation!

Speaking of protests:

And, congrats:

Over at our VP’s timeline, poetry is to be expected at all times:

What better than Silvio Rodriguez to get in that Easter Week imperialism defeating mood

And also, gloating of “financial strength”. Things sure are wonderful at this side of twitterland.

After the eggcident, Maduro posted what could be one of the most genuinely awkward videos of all time:

And then payed a visit to St. Vincent and then came back to post more videos

Hegemon corp. is filled with triggerhappy community managers, so about 90% of TL’s are filled with: Retweets of Maduro. You’ll get a headache trying to get actual statements from these people.

Feliz Viernes Santo.

Astrid Cantor

Head of the Church of Martha Stewart: I bake therefore I am. Táchirense: Almojabana and quesadilla lover, "toche" and "juemadre" user. Pastelitos de queso con bocadillo fanatic and overall gochadas supporter. Also doctor —as in proper MD— and pobresora universitaria too.